How real is the virtual ???......

I love you… when did you last look into the mirror and say the three magic words to yourself.

How silly is what you just remarked, right ? Infact it isn’t silly my friend. We don’t love ourselves or appreciate who we are but strangely enough, expect the world to go gaga over us. To begin with, is our online identity an exact replica of our real self ? I guess not. Most profiles on Facebook have the profile picture of the Shahids, Katrinas and Priyankas of the world. Often if we are tagged in a picture and our nose appears a little crooked (actually that’s how it is) or our hair is not in place (or our scalp is showing), we prefer removing the tag and only like to keep pictures that have us looking like a dream.

A lot of thought goes into a status update. After all, we want at least 10 likes to begin with. The spirit to prove yourself as the cooler one naturally comes to the fore.

Last week I attended a wedding and the couple had met through a social networking site. The guy stalked her for months after which the girl agreed to meet him. It was love at first sight though she did realize that he was far from being the suave gentleman as portrayed through the online chats.

Infact, social networking sites have become another platform to know your romantic interest better. So, if you start conversing with this ‘eligible bachelor’ who is on the look out, the first thing he will do to bridge the gap is start following you on twitter or send you a friend request on Facebook. Under such unexpected circumstances, a well maintained , good looking Facebook page always comes to rescue.

But, if you look carefully.. the real self does reveal in those pictures and status updates. How does one react to a certain rape incident or celebrate his birthday with his friends or respond to a friend’s status update speaks volumes about one’s character traits and personality.

The social networking sites make you social enough to have 500 plus friends in your list but how many of them are we really friends with ? Most are plain acquaintances or people we had a chance encounter with or people who matter in the work sphere. Certainly, they cant be called  friends, yet who minds an impressive photograph or interesting status update inviting comments and likes from strangers ? Also, when we communicate with strangers online, we can be more confrontational and flirtatious than we normally are.. Words and expressions are framed appropriately, jokes are planned and the vocabulary is in place. If you want the world to know that you are single, then update your relationship status and all the eligible bachelors and spinsters in the town would get the intended signal. If you are confused about the relationship and wanting respite, then the status becomes ‘complicated’ so that ex flames can feel encouraged to try their luck again.

In essence, the online world is a virtual world where everybody concerned is trying to put their best foot forward, at times by conditionally expressing themselves and at other times through words of wisdom and portfolio pictures. But the person behind that laptop , even better ipad or tablet.. is you.. So why not be real ? The next time, you are tagged in a picture that shows your belly and also your scalp.. do not untag, instead make it your profile picture. Let the world know the real you and love you for who you are ! You are special, beautiful and unique just the way you are.. a sample like none other !

Its coldddd... !!!!

The doorbell rings.. I look at my dad who looks at mum who stares back at me.. and each look carries a plea.. ‘please open the door.. I cant get up, its coldddd !’

Finally, the lady of the house, as always , takes the lead in responding to the restless stranger at our door step who, by now seems to be enjoying the ‘Go-on-ringing-the-doorbell’ game. Well, he is also feeling coldddd !

The fact of the matter is that this biting cold has left one incapacitated to function normally. The thought of taking a bath is dreadful in itself. The few moments that give you solace are the ones when you are embraced by ripples of warm water in the cozy bath tub or when you are cut off from the world , hidden in the recesses of your warm quilt, or when you are joyfully sipping endless cups of tea that does give you momentary relief.

And who cares about going to the beauty parlour ? So what if waxing is long overdue and eyebrows are shaggy and bushy. Non smokers can also be seen smoking perpetually. The elderly couples look endearing in their monkey caps. Winter attire can be equally trendy, girls in my neighbourhood make me believe so. Their pet dog aka Robert is also sporting a stylish jacket that has ‘Pet Mafia’ written on it. The whole family including Robert can be seen fighting for seating space, right in front of the heater.

So, while we do want the temperatures to increase, most of us are relatively acclimatized to the Delhi weather and we do manage to get through the Delhi winter each year.

But, that’s not true in all cases. Shakuntala, my house maid, walked in this morning without her slippers. It was a ‘cold’ sight and we could hardly fathom how she managed to walk the distance on this cold morning barefoot.

‘Chori ho gaye aunty’ she was sharing the sad tale of events with my mother who deeply empathised with her and took out a pair of slippers from the shoe rack for Shakuntala.

“Aunty, aur razai bhi. Bache le lete hain. Bahut thand hai..”

For many like Shakuntala, this is the ‘winter’ of their lives. They are victors if they get through this season alive.  

Grateful that we have all the clothes, the quilts, the tea bags, the heaters, the boots, the jackets..et all to keep us warm and safe. Hence, it would be a good idea to share some of our stuff with those who need it.. After all, its the warmth of a sincere heart that can beat the cold, no matter how biting or fierce !